Despair…

What is life, is it only this despair

Woof… went all my dreams flying in the air

Not that I had dreams also too big

Just someone who loves with whom life could’ve been a merry zig

This heartache and these constant tears

This agony and heart full of fears

Weren’t part of the vision about my future

There was love, peace and lot of laughter

I know sorrow comes when joy one has to reach

There is darkness before light fills the corner each

There are heartbreaks when love round the corner waits

And failures are there before we meet our fate

But waiting and waiting and waiting endlessly

And crying and crying, eyes shed tears ceaselessly

Heart breaks and the soul feels lonely

Where to go, what to do, I look around hopelessly

All doors closed, only turning around is possible

Making a u turn and returning seems viable

To the very state which caused all that’s said above

Are you laughing now – the Almighty there above?

Not saying You are wrong, I surely must be deserving

Of this pain and agony, that’s why I must be suffering

Will this how I’ll live forever… is what gives a shiver

Will each day of life be such… till with last breath my lips quiver?

To die before dying is what has happened to me

Now it is just living for name though nothing is remaining to be

Where are all those hopes, where is that smile?

Where is the happiness, my desire to strive?

Where is that twinkle in my eye,

Which when conveyed, made me feel shy!

Where is my zest for life, the love that I had in abundance?

Can I get all these back at this very instance?

What is the purpose of my life, why have You sent me here?

Can You kindly towards that path my life steer?

Tired of seeing insults and enough of failures now

Being looked down upon, and giving everything with a bow

I am looking upon You to guide me the right way

Can You please have mercy and show me the day?

This darkness is empowering and will engulf me all

Oh please hold my hand and save me this final fall

Make me strong or hold me tight

Let me go… or else fill me with Your light

Change my heart and mind, give my soul its purpose

Or teach me the ways to deal with life’s circus!

To live is getting tougher

The road is getting even rougher

I can’t do it without You, so do remember this,

Please come my way without any further tiff!